CHERRIFIED
This is the situation: There is a beautiful princess trapped in a castle guarded by a dragon. Here is the end of the

story with different kind of metalheads as knights.



* POWER METAL

The protagonist arrives riding a white unicorn, escapes from the dragon, saves the princess and makes love to her in an

enchanted forest.



* THRASH METAL

The protagonist arrives, fights the dragon, saves the princess and fucks her.



* HEAVY METAL

The protagonist arrives on a harley, kills the dragon, drinks a few beers and fucks the princess.



*FOLK METAL

The protagonist arrives with some friends playing acordions, violins, flutes and many more weird instruments, the dragon

falls asleep (because of all the dancing). Then all leave........ without the princess.



* VIKING METAL

The protagonist arrives in a ship, kills the dragon with his mighty axe, skins the dragon and eats it, rapes the

princess to death, steals her belongings and burns the castle before leaving.



* DEATH METAL

The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon, fucks the princess and kills her, then leaves.



* BLACK METAL

The protagonist arrives at midnight, kills the dragon and impales it in front of the castle. Then he sodomizes the

princess, drinks her blood in a ritual before killing her. Then he impales the princess next to the dragon.



* GORE METAL

The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon and spreads his guts in front of the castle, fucks the princess and kills her.

Then he fucks the dead body again, slashes her belly and eats her guts. Then he fucks the carcass for the third time,

burns the corpse and fucks it for the last time.



* DOOM METAL

The protagonist arrives, sees the size of the dragon and thinks he could never beat him, then he gets depressed and

commits suicide. The dragon eats his body and the princess as dessert. That's the end of the sad story.



* PROGRESSIVE METAL

The protagonist arrives with a guitar and plays a solo of 26 minutes. The dragon kills himself out of boredom. The

protagonist arrives to the princess' bedroom, plays another solo with all the techniques and tunes he learned in the

last year of the conservatory. The princess escapes looking for the 'HEAVY METAL' protagonist.



* GLAM METAL

The protagonist arrives, the dragon laughs at the guy's appearance and lets him enter. He steals the princess' make up

and tries to paint the castle in a beautiful pink colour.



* NU METAL

The protagonist arrives in a run down Honda Civic and attempts to fight the dragon but he burns to death when his

moronic baggy clothes catch fire.

@музыка: gothica - night thoughts - 07 - the land under the waves.mp3

Комментарии
10.04.2005 в 23:30

i am stretched on your grave
:-D очень круто))... больше всего круто про дум и про прогрессив))
12.04.2005 в 20:24

То же самое, но на русском языке я видел здесь - http://www.diary.ru/~MetalZone/?com...;postid=4448362